Golden Bear (eithne_star) wrote,
Golden Bear

  • Mood:

Didn't you know I was a superhero?

Sleeping in is SO nice. Even when your allergies still hate you. Still on the mend, but nowhere near as wretched as Tuesday. Gah, I'm amazed I survived. Slept till noonish, then got up and puttered around for a bit. Texted Tim, made tentative plans to meet for lunch, since he's at Mermaid today. Showered, , got the laundry started, headed to Target. My dad called me in a couple prescriptions that I needed to pick up. Got there, grabbed a few other things I needed...and proceeded to stand around for 10 minutes while the pharmacist called my insurance company. Turns out you have to have a separate card for prescriptions (which I had no idea and did not receive) so the meds weren't covered. Woulda cost me over $150 to get them without the coverage, so I opted to hold out until I got it taken care of. Called the number on the back later, got it straightened out, but I'll still have to wait for the card to come in before I can pick them up. Guess I'll have to be miserable for a little while longer. Maybe I should have gone to the Wellness Center. Little late now. Tim texted me while I was leaving to tell me that his lunch was right then (gee, thanks) and then again at 6:45. Suppose I'll have to go to that one then. Talked to Luke too; we're supposed to play catch tonight--I even found my glove! Forgot to buy a baseball though. Though I'm thinking that's not gonna happen--we don't have much daylight left and my allergies are still kicking my ass. Agreed on a movie date instead. Finished up the laundry and tried to download some songs, but my stupid computer kept shutting off, then wouldn't be able to restart the downloads once it rebooted. Gah! Took me over an hour just to download two songs! And of course by this point I've lost track of time and didn't realize that it was already 6:30. Guess I won't be going to see Tim. Damn. Texted him, apologized (though it's not like he's never stood me up before) then headed over to Luke's shortly after. Saw him coming in the gate while he was getting his mail, so I drove him the rest of the way to his house. Forgot until we got there that he's got a cat--oops. Too bad too; she's a snuggler and she likes me, but I was already having enough problems breathing, so she got banned to the upstairs. Picked Hot Fuzz to watch. If you've never seen it, you should. I was expecting cheap comedy and a loose plotline, but it was actually really good. Intentionally overdramatic and British to boot. Hilarious. Ordered pizza after that, which probably wasn't a good idea, but I was starving. Watched some Robot Chicken while eating, just chilling on the couch, and got into the predictable tickle fight. Made me really happy and sad all at the same time. I kept remembering the last time I'd come over; it rained, just the same, and we tickle-fought, just the same. He's so easy to talk to that I just slid right back into that same banter--with one important exception. The last time I was there it was the beginning--and the end--of our relationship. That was the night that Tim and I fought....and he finally told me he loved me. What a time. I'd tried to let go of Tim, I really had. I was FINALLY interested enough in someone else to give him a chance...and he pulls this. I was so ANGRY with Tim. How could he? I tried. I did. But in the end, Tim won, and Luke...didn't. But nights like tonight, hanging out, joking back and forth, just being there with each makes me wonder: what if things had turned out differently? I think Luke was thinking about the same thing. I got a feeling a couple times that he wanted to kiss me, sniffles and all. A credit to him that he didn't try. I don't know what I would have done. Pushed him away..or let him? Don't mistake me. I love Tim. But a little part of me will always wonder about the one that got away. Dangerous thoughts, those. But thoughts they will remain. I may wonder about Luke, might even regret it a little, but I will stand by Tim's side until he tells me to leave. You know me. I would NEVER give him cause to distrust me. As for Luke...well. As long as he plays by the rules, no one will get hurt. I've had enough of breaking them. *sigh* Such melancholy thoughts for what was really a great night. Maybe I'm so caught up in Luke because I haven't seen Tim lately and I'm projecting. Hopefully I'll get to see him soon; life just seems to have gotten in the way lately. Time for bed; Castle Show in the morning.
Food Log:
22oz Mediterranean Monster Smoothie
1 slice Almond Cherry bread
1 Raspberry Twist Smirnoff
4 slices pepperoni pizza
Tummy was definitely rumbly after the pizza. Stupid girl.

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