July 1st, 2004


You're just jealous because the voices talk to ME

Wow. Um, okay. Let me organize. Mike called this morning to see what I was doing and if I wanted to do something with him. Sure okay, take shower, head over. While waiting for him to burn CD and take shower, read magazine. While reading magazine, hear loud thump--not cat. Run upstairs, Mike passed out on the floor. His heart condition decided to act up because he got all stressed out--somebody stole $200 from him over the weekend that was supposed to be for rent. Eventually got him into the bed, where he promptly passed out again in my lap, for about an hour. Woke him up, made him a sandwich , talked to him a little bit (mostly both of us apologizing for everything under the sun) and he fell asleep again for another 2 1/2 hours. So I got my Soc. book out of the car and studied for my test (yeah, me, multitasking). Mandy came over around 4, managed to get him to actually eat the sandwich, and I left for my class. Took test, wasn't too bad, just long, and went over to Mandy's to babysit Mike further while she was at Apprentice. Neither of us would let him drive. Finally got a chance to talk to Mike about some of the stuff that's been bugging me--ordinary and arcane. I think we made some progress. Of course, things are never easy, talking to the not-quite-former love of your life. But we've reached a kind of understanding: He's there for me, I'm there for him, and whatever this fucking dead god throws at us, we're going to throw it right back. Good compromise, yes? Although, it's a bit disconcerting being more-than-half in love with two people. I still want Stephen back, yet this not-so-nice part keeps telling me that I need to be with Mike. It's rather bewildering. Talked to Margaret too about a bunch of stuff, none of it very nice, and discovered why it is I've been acting so...hmmm...strangely? lately--past lives can be a bitch. Okay, yes, I believe in past lives, but I've never had one try to take over my body before. Yeah, that not-so-nice voice in my head telling me to do not-so-nice things concerning Mike and Mandy's relationship? Yeah, that's her. And she won't shut up. And the really funny part is, I agree with her on most points, but I'm still not going to go along with them. Stupid...self. Anyway, learned more about the life that's desperate to not lose again, and had a really good laugh out of it. I mean, come on, can you just see me talking to a shrink about this? I'd get a fluffy room and a new wardrobe in no time. Anyway. Watched the Wedding Singer--good movie--and drove Mike home so he could get his car. Now I think it's sleepy time, cuz I have to work tomorrow through next Tuesday and it will not be fun, and finish my homework. Yucky. But at least I get time and a half on Sunday. Yeah holidays!
  • Current Music
    I Love You by Sarah McLachlan